Five things South Africa can do to finally win the World Cup

South Africa failed to cross they semis hurdle again when they lost to New Zealand in thrilling fashion on Tuesday.

Another World Cup campaign has ended in tears for the team from the southern part of Africa. Barring 1992 (where they were a surprise packet being captained by a former Australian player), the South Africans have gone into every World Cup as among the favourites, and more often than not have performed well enough only to be undone by some quirk of fate or cricket legalese – they remain the only team to have gone out of a World Cup in spite of not losing in a semi-final (they tied with Australia in 1999, but had to go home because they had lost to them earlier). (Full Coverage| Points table| Fixtures)

Clearly, merely being scientific (they were the first team to contact their captain via wireless headset in 1999), hard working and even good cricketers is not enough. We think it is time that they started thinking out of the box (not the one worn by batsmen!) if they want to taste World Cup success. Some measures that they could consider taking are:

Knock out knock-outs!

Barring the odd aberration here and there – the shock defeat to Zimbabwe in 1999 for instance – the South Africans have generally played very well in the league stages of the tournament. Where things go wrong are in the knock out stages (generally). So perhaps at the next ICC meeting related to the World Cup, they should propose making the entire tournament league-based, with no knock out stages. That might annoy some teams but on the flip side, the associate nations would get lots more matches, which would assure their vote on the matter. Yes, it would make the tournament a lot longer but then, with every team assured of playing each other, TV channels would have lots of mouth watering ties lined up (England vs Australia, India vs Pakistan…mauka, mauka, and so on). Think of the 1992 World Cup, without the semi-finals or finals. No knock outs, no chokes.

Play the World Cup in the Sahara (barring that, the UAE)

If they cannot change the format of the tournament, the next best option would be to change its venue. Moving it to a stadium in the Sahara desert would be perfect, but as that exists not, playing it in a place like the UAE would ensure that given the relatively low levels of rainfall in that region, at least Messrs. Duckworth and Lewis will not rain on the South African party’s chances of picking up cricket’s premium prize. If that sounds a but extreme, let it be remembered that rain and the run revision rules accompanying it has ruined South Africa’s chances in the World Cup on three occasions – 1992, 2003 and 2015. Best to neutralise the rain at least!

Forget coaches, hire a hypnotist

It is not coaches like Procter, Woolmer and Kirsten, that the South Africans need. What they need is a hypnotist. One who zaps them thoroughly before and during matches, making them believe two key messages: “this is not a knock out match” and “it is not going to rain.” No, it is not as insane as it sounds. It would be an innovative touch – while other teams have 12th men running out with drinks, towels and the like, the South African team could have a hypnotist coming out with a couch and giving the players one or two minute sessions. No, we don’t see anyone objecting – more and longer breaks in cricket mean more time for ads (you can NEVER have too much time for ads – just ask the ICC if you don’t believe us).

Start weeping during a match, not after it

In every World Cup, we see the same pattern repeating itself. The South Africans arrive as a tough, organised team and the team everyone wants to beat. It inevitably ends with them in tears when they unexpectedly lose, and then no one wants them to lose. Perhaps it is time to change tack and bring on the tears well before a loss actually happens. Forget the spectators, we can even see opposition players’ hearts melt as they see the tough South Africans break down, fearing defeat and disappointment. And that change in mood should swing matters the way of the South Africans – hell, if you cannot win a match with the spectators and the opposition rooting for you…when can you?

Lose every match from now until the next World Cup

Great expectations are a pain. Just ask Charles Dickens’ Pip if you do not believe us. Which is why we think South Africa get their build up to every tournament totally wrong. Instead of riding into a tournament on a crest of victory, they should try and lose every match before it gets underway. That should take the expectations off – #GiveUsSomethingAnythingPlease is a lot less stressful than #WeWontGiveItBack.

Source:: Indian Express